What type of card shopper are you?

Good morning pals. I'm sure you've all seen the news out of Oklahoma today. I actually had to turn it off this morning. I just couldn't take it. My heart goes out to the area/families/all people affected by the storms.

I'm going to keep it light around here today since the news is breaking our hearts. Random question: is it "affected" or "effected?"

You don't come here for my grammar skills. Obviously. Or my spelling skills. (I just googled how to spell "obviously.) Full disclosure here people!

Let's get on with it. If you know me in real life, you know I love sending cards/postcards. I frequent the card section at Target likes it's my job. Have you ever noticed there are certain types of card shoppers? I'll break it down -

*The "how fast can I get this stupid card and go?" card shopper. Dudes, I'm not trying to be sexist, but it's normally you. You can practically see the trail of dust behind you as you scoop up the 4 cards on the corner display without even setting foot in the actual card aisle, all while making a beeline for the checkout. *Can also be referred to as, speedy gonzalez. (I had to google the word "beeline")

The "lingering" card shopper. They are in the aisle f-o-r-e-v-e-r. You've done an entire monthly shopping throughout the whole store and they are still there... with an empty basket... reading the same card. Hey. Hey you! Yeah, you! They are called greeting cards! They say witty things, sometimes sentimental. Pick some out and get going. Don't you have a life to go live?

The "bigger is better" card shopper. Every card aisle has at least a few of those over-sized, jumbo greeting cards. I'm always amazed to see someone actually go over and consider getting one! Is that necessary? Really? The small greeting cards are already like $5 bucks! Who spends $15 on a greeting card!?

The "cell phone" card shopper. You can't possibly read a greeting card while talking on your cell phone. Give the cards some respect! You can see the lady who just picked up a hilarious Awkward Family Photo card and she isn't even laughing! Go have an argument on your cell phone somewhere else!

There you have it. Now you know I judge people in the card aisle.

Let's end the day with a public service announcement! Although I do love a good riddle more than the next person, tattoos are forever people. Mmkay?

Float on...